A SIMPLE THERAPY TO HELP A FRIEND

A simple therapy I've used in various forms for emotional problems is something anyone can do who has the will to help others. Doing therapy on yourself is almost impossible. Otherwise nobody would be with mental problems. It takes an outside intervention of some type, but usually a person. This method works by removing the emotional content of situations over and done with, like rejection by a parent, a lover, an abortion, a scary situation, stage fright, all phobias, etc. But properly done you can also fix sex inadequacy problems, allergies, headaches including migraines, some visual problems, skin problems , test anxiety and a host of other things. Most hospital admissions are for psychosomatic problems.

You have to learn to walk before you can run. So try the following and get your self -confidence up. It is conveyed to your subject by your manner and tone of voice. Try several people, like at a party. If when the subject closes his/her eyes they tend to flutter, he's probably an easy subject. In general. women are more receptive to this sort of thing. GIVE THEM PRIVACY! It is not at all necessary for you or anyone else to know what the subject thinks of in his own mind. If he wants to share it later, OK. But you will get more and better results at first by letting the subject choose an emotional event he can remember and feel emotions with.

Try this to help a friend:

Have the person close his eyes and remember something very upsetting that he experienced in the past. Tell him to feel the feelings he had then, and give him a few seconds to retrieve the feelings. He should not talk. That interferes. Say the following as though there weren't the slightest doubt in your mind::

"When you can feel the upsetting feelings, just nod your head." When the person nods his head, say:

"When I squeeze your shoulder and say DISCONNECT! it will disconnect you from the cause of those upsetting feelings you're feeling now at all levels of your mind." Say it again in a slightly different way so you KNOW the subject understands what you're going to do and what will happen.

Then squeeze the shoulder 3 times, each time saying forcefully "disconnect!" simultaneously to produce a slight startle. Then say "Now try to get those feelings back and you'll find you can't do it."

It is absolutely essential that the message is clearly understood. You can tell the person ahead of time exactly what you're going to do and say. There's no deceit or trickery here. It is a mechanical method.

I.f he can't get the feelings back, or the feelings are greatly diminished, you've succeeded. The person will be reluctant to admit, often times, the feelings are gone because he doesn't know how that's possible. He'll say "Well, they're gone for now." Watch him, and note behavioral changes. Mood swings will be more shallow and less frequent if you've taken out a big stress. Do this for any upsetting feelings a person can bring up by thinking back in time. Again, they needn't reveal a thing! However if they have no problem saying what happened, you can tailor your suggestion to that event (auto accident, acute embarrassment, an illness, operation, something negative a person said that hurt, etc.)

After a love affair gone bad, modify it to say "it will disconnect you emotionally from (Mary) at all levels of your mind." Then do the squeeze and DISCONNECT! 3 times as before and test for residual feelings. when the subject thinks of (Mary). If (Mary) is still around and he has hopes of getting her back, it won't work. It MUST be over and done with.

Current stresses are harder to work with. This method works best by removing the emotional content of traumatic situations that are over and done with.. Persons on drugs may not respond because they can't get into the feelings due to whatever drug is used to keep down their emotions. Most likely the therapy is done nevertheless but I really have little experience with that.

This simple therapy was derived from many years experience doing hypnoanalysis, most of the deep trance phenomena of hypnosis, and studying faith healers. It contains the essential elements for mental and some physical healing. I NEVER induce a trance for healing. I use deep trance phenomena for practical jokes (more later).

You don't need to understand this method to make it work. The method is called suggestion with a trigger. Don't knock it until you try it. Suggestion is the most widely used form of healing in the world (acupuncture, witchcraft, faith healers, psychic surgery, spirit healers, shrines, potions, rituals). For many things, it's the most effective healing modality when properly delivered under the right circumstances.

If you're a weak personality yourself, you probably won't try it. Suggestion should ALWAYS be given in a tone of voice that implies a certainty of the result.

EVALUATION: This is far more involved than the therapy. If you've taken out the emotions from a seriously upsetting event, the person will have a personality change. THE MEMORY REMAINS, BUT THE EMOTION IS GONE. The person will be more even tempered and things which used to upset him will not do so any more, or at least not so much. Hurts and fears are easiest. Angers are harder. The person's mate or associates are the ones most likely to note the personality change, much more so than the person himself. As this website evolves I will give more details on how to treat various conditions. But if you start now with what I've given you, you'll be ready to forge ahead on your own before long. Each person should have several things you can disconnect them from emotionally. If they can remember and feel upsetting emotions, they have a problem!

Remember the key: Define the trigger (when I squeeze your shoulder, snap my fingers, clap my hands or whatever) Give the suggestion. Pull the trigger! (Squeeze, snap or clap)

If you're a weak personality yourself, you probably won't try it, for fear of losing face. You have to get over that. When I do this I KNOW it works because I've done it thousands of times, and on radio and TV as well. I'm not afraid of losing face because I'm a very secure and successful older man. I'm not concerned what other people think. I KNOW what I can do, have done, and that nothing works all the time. I just try to help, and I usually succeed. The successes give great personal satisfaction. I want YOU to succeed too. I have given you a method to put your suggestion directly into the subconscious. Having the person in a trance doesn't do a bit better when it comes to therapy. If the suggestion is properly worded and not objectional to the person, it will be accepted. If, however, the person derives a benefit for his affliction, forget it. Find someone else! If it doesn't seem to have succeeded the first time, do it again. You can't hurt anything. Each time you do it you reduce the emotional content of the experience. So you do the whole thing three or four times. So what? You've used up a full 3 minutes. Big deal! How much time does a therapist spend? Lots. And most likely will not get nearly as good a result as you will. Repetition helps.

For a drug-free cure that is inexpensive and lasts, see a hypnoanalyst. They deal with the subconscious, the seat of the emotions. Conventional therapists know little or nothing about how the mind works, and they want to keep you coming back. A good hypnoanalyst will have you a lot better in one session.

NOTE: The author of this page is not a state or medically-licensed professional.


Loren Parks


Loren Parks,
Psychological Research Foundation, Inc.


P.S. The stage hypnotist must get some deep trance subjects to put on a good show. The deep trance subject will hallucinate readly. A common trick is to give the subject an imaginary tube to look thru that shows everyone he looks at as being naked. They giggle and smile as they look around on the stage, especially at the hypnotist. I gave a friend in Chicago (I'm in Oregon) this suggestion by phone. I simply said to her that the next person who walked into her office would be stark naked. I called the next day to check on my work. She laughed and said it worked and that while it was happening she was afraid she would get fired, because it was her boss who walked in and she could hardly keep from laughing. I guess it lasted all the time he was there. No, I can't do that with everybody. Just a few whom I've trained and were naturally good subjects.


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Last Updated July 15, 1997